I have a feeling my good ole friend MS. Bi-Polar for the Holidays is kicking in and I am rapid cycling. One minute I have so much energy sleep seems like a foreign word and the next all I want to do is give myself a pity-party. However, I have made it back to this blog and would like to recap the past few days.
I had my slumber party for recovering women Saturday night for my early bday celebration, at first I was dissappointed at the turn out and then my Higher Power said the people that need to be here are. As I look back the most important person there was not me, it was a newcomer who celebrated her second 30 days on Monday. She actually spent the night and is not a woman who gets along well with other women yet. She was shown, we have fun without the use of drugs or alcohol at parties. I spent the whole next day sleeping I am not as young as I used to be. Staying up late and watching movies and eating tons of food and sweets takes a toll on me these days. I did make my Home Group Sunday night, but that's all I accomplished on Sunday.
It was a great meeting concerning the sixth step. It was also a good place to have other people finish eating up my cake, because I found I was starting to like the cream cheese frosting too much and every time I went into the kitchen I was grabbing a piece. Just because I turned 39 doesn't mean I need to put on 39 pounds. It was red velvet cake too. Having something different like that, it went fast at the meeting.
On Monday, my family threw me a celebration. This was my actual bellybutton birthday day. My parents hooked up steak dinner with all the fixings. They spent a major portion of their day preparing for me. For someone who still can never ask to spend the night, not even on the floor, no matter what is happening in my life, like I learned after one of my past rapes when I ended up having to spend the night at the police station becase they wouldn't pick me up. These same people invited me into their household and spent time preparing a major meal in my honor and bought me new pajamas, a pretty sweater, and a warm, fuzzy, housecoat(this is the only thing I asked for).
Since the thanksgiving holiday and my birthday took up so much of my time, my tutoring students had 1 extra day of holiday break from me because I did not work on Monday, my birthday. However, yesterday was a tutoring marathon helping evey student. I started at 930 worked until 330 took a break til 6 then worked until 1000. But this goes to show I am becoming more responsible and people can depend on me. On this subject reminds of the really cool news that happened during a phone call at 830 yesterday.
My dad's neighbor, they live in a ritzy area, called me in the morning. She has a dog, lady, a type of spaniel and a cat, Willow. She has witnessed me through my ups and downs since she is my dads neighbor and she has seen how I feel about Tasia and animals in general. She was almost deterrmined not to go on a family trip from Dec 26 to Jan 11 to Florida(we live in Michigan) Escaping this weather would be a blessing especially for Florida's weather. Anyway, she called me and asked me if I would bring Tasia over and house and pet sit while she was away on her trip.
You could've knocked me over with a leftover birthday mylar balloon. Someone is trusting me enough with all they hold dear while they will be out of the state. Let's recap the same girl who lived homeless, was a prostitute, hustled on the streets daily and often sold things that weren't hers to begin with is being trusted with a family's mosted valued possession, their home and pets. And the thing of it , when they come home, the tv and dvd player, and computer, and even the house will still belong to the rightful owners. People are starting to trust me after 19 months of living the NA program and living my life accordingly. This gives me hope and reassures me that all the effort I am putting into my recovery are definitely worth it. I feel better about myself and some people are starting to the changes in my life.
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