Recalling Another Almost Death Experience

I met a girl in the hallway of an apartment building we were all squatting in.  She was stayin on the second floor and I was stayin on the third.  She'd been there longer. I'd only been around a couple of weeks.  She was lookin for someone to smoke some crack with and invited.  What addict turns down free crack, right? So I followed her to the apartment she was squatting in and smoked some with her and she seemed alright but the crack was gone so I went out to hustle.

Later on that night I ran into her and a trick of hers and her husband and they were all goin back to the part of the building they were staying at and they invited me.  She told her husband she met earlier and I was ok.  Everything went ok earlier, so I went along.  Well, things started to get crazy.  She wanted everyone to take their clothes off and wouldn't let anyone else smoke any of the crack.  Luckily, I wasn't dumb enough to take my clothes off before I got any crack and when her husband offered me a packed pipe she smacked it out of my mouth across the room saying " How you gonna offer her to smoke before me."  Remind you there were four of us in the room and she the only one who had gotten to smoke.  After about 20 minutes, I noticed she'd been drinking and then she got jealous.  She smashed the liquor bottle on the broken out out window so the neck was in her hand and the jagged part was being waved around wildly at everyone in the room, but especially me since I was the only other female in the room.

I don't remember how, my find still blocks out portions of this night, but I got out of the room.  I went up to the portion where I was staying with a friend cause she didn't know where my spot was.  After talking with my friend who told my about this building and was sharing this portion of the building of me, he'd been there about a year, he informed he how absolutely insane she was.

That same night I was jonsing so I went out to look for a trick or two to make some money.  Wouldn't you know it, the crazy lady's husband had had enough of her to and had gotten a HHR vehichle from his cousin.  He saw me as I was coming back into the parking lot after striking out on the hoe stroll.  He rolled down the window and said "Jump in, before she sees you."  He had crack earlier so I figured he had some again.

He drove me across town to a city park in the back.  It was about 11pm and dark and no one else was around and I was used to going to parks to trick for crack but not this one.  When we got out of the car we went to a picnic table and he packed a stem for me.  Then he said he wanted a blow job. 

This is where some parts are extremely clearly etched in memory and some are extremely erased from my memory so sorry if this recounting goes kinda fuzzy. 

He grabbed me by my neck and said " Do it right.  Don't play that hoe shit, and try to do it quick."  For about the next forty-five minutes I was told the following statements over and over.  "Were alone here no one would find you until the morning."  "I should snap your neck right now."as her would pull my hair forcing my head from side to side. I thought for sure tonight was the night I would finally die.  "Do it right."  "Quit playing those ho games, you're not gonna get this done quickly."  Eventually I knocked his crack over, which ended up being benzo anyway, so he forced me onto the ground and with his knees on my shoulders he got my pants down.

Then he grabbed my neck again and raped me.  Then He got me back into the car.  I thought it was over but it wasn't.  He made a call and said "Are you ready? I got one."  He told me he was taking me to his friends so they could rape me too and then he and his wife were going to beat the shit out of me and that they did this type of thing all the time.  He actually he referred to himself and his wife as Bonnie and Clyde.

So I thought fast, luckily it was benzo and not crack, so I wasn't totally stuck.  When he turned to pull out of the city park, in the middle of the turn I flung open the car door and jumped out.  I remember hearing him say "Don't do that."

I ran down a busy street in the opposite direction of the way the car was facing so he couldn't follow me and had no choice except to drive away.  Which he did. Fast.  I was running wildly down the middle of a busy road my arms waving back and forth over my head yelling "Please Help Me Please Help Me."

I think it was 4 or 5 cars that passed me before someone actually stopped.  It was a group of 3 yuppie boys goin to a club.  They were concerned and asked what I needed.  I told them I'd been raped and needed to go home.  They tried to talk me into goin to the hospital, they were all confused they didn't know what to do and I kept saying no just take me home.  I actually went to a different spot and told them that was my home.

After they drove off, I hitchhiked from near Detroit to Flint to see the only person I thought would understand.  A man I met in recovery and was in love with.  His mom didn't know what was going on and wanted me to take a shower before his daughter came down for breakfast.(Yeah, he still lived with his mom who has custody of his daughter, but that's another story.)

Anyway, since we were previously involved his mother knew my family and within a few hours she got a version of what happened by my simply saying "I was raped and needed to see C."  She drove me home to my dad who wanted nothing to do with me since I'd been back out on the streets for awhile, again.  However he did say I needed to file a police report.

I didn't want to go through that either but finally after an hour of coaxing which seemed liked days as I still wasn't high and that was the whole purpose of mission that started the night before, I allowed Miss Barbara to take me to the police station.

I tried to write a report as well as I could but I was forgetting to how to spell, I still hadn't slept, and I hadn't slept for a few days previously because I'd been smoking.  I had no home address or phone number and it took awhile and I went through the rape kit and everything.  When I was done, the officer called my dad to come pick me up.  He wouldn't come.  I can remember hearing the officer say"But she's your daughter." It didn't matter.

I ended up sleeping in the police station waiting room sitting in a chair with my head on a table. I woke up in the morning and realized no one was coming for me and I had nowhere to go.  I couldn't go back to where I was squatting because I had given a good description of the man and where to find him and I saw a xerox picture of him at one point during the night so I know the police had picked him up.

My feet were blistered and aching because when I was hitchhiking I ended up walking half the way.  I did not know what to do I was lost.  I sat on the sidewalk outside of the police station with my head on my knees trying to figure what and where to go and do next.  Then the owner of a three quarter house I had stayed at before showed up.

My dad had called her and told her where I was and she came and got me.  Again, I reentered a three quarter house.

I don't want to put a moral or some astounding truth to this story I just want to present the facts about this situation.  I need to realize the decisions I make when I use drugs put me in these types of situations and I need to address them in order to heal from them.